As a kid, when I’d get angry instead of throwing a fuss I’d simply go silent. Lay myself on the damn floor like I was dead and sulk until the feeling passed. I handled anger in my adult years very similarly (minus the time I tore my slumlord a new asshole). I would shut down completely and avoid any means to communicate. Listening to the all the reasons my ego gave me that I was right and deserved an apology from whoever fucked up my vibe.
Detachment and Cynicism
Earlier this year, the stress of living in a new city, working a new job, running a business and balancing everyone else’s needs became too much. The moment I became concerned was not after yelling & breaking hangers nor was it realizing my default mood was salty bitch, but it was actually when other peoples sadness or pain made me feel absolutely nothing (& I am chronically empathetic, so yikes). Seeing how my emotions were effecting my ability to care for the people I loved most, I knew I had to get a handle on things.
Anger doesn’t just manifest in pure rage. When we avoid digesting its complexity, anger can destroy health, relationships, and spiritual development. How do you digest emotions? Great Q. Same way you digest food - the belly. When a moment arises that sparks the fiery in your tummy, send breath to it. This is called compassionate breathing. It takes time to build awareness around it, but if you practice it for just 3 days, it can become your bodies natural response to an uncomfortable or unhappy situation. I dare you to try it! The next time you are blamed or condemned (or doing the blaming / condemning), instead of fighting or avoiding, listen and breathe compassionately. Compassion is the antidote for anger and bitterness.